the gal died!

that china gal that was lost is confirmed to be dead. so poor thing, what would a 9 year old gal do to deserve such a horrible death? her mum must be very heart broken.

police felt that the scene of murder took place in the warehouse of the pasir panjang wholesale centre. it must be horrible. wonder what really happen to her. wonder what went through her mind as she was being killed? it must have been horrible to be stuffed in a paper box and thrown in a ulu place.

i believe she would come back to haunt her murderer. it's a tragic death! she should come back to haunt the killer.

i heard one urban legend that they needed children's heads in order to build bridge. is it true or not?

weekend came and gone

the weekend came and went so fast. it's like monday tmr and it's work again. what did i do during the weekends? oh, we went warren on saturday, but it was raining so heavily, can't swim, we all ended up bowling.

we all very lousy leh, must be long time never bowl already. marcus and mabel very cute, they are like our cheering team like that. when we strike or spare, they would be so happy and cheered us on. but this cheering team also very straight forward with their remarks if u didn't clear the pins. they would go like, 'that's no good!' (said with a frown)

then it was dinner time, wow, we all like having wedding dinner like that, wait until 8pm then start dinner. hungry like mad. oh, the people i dun like to see did not turn up due to some other commitments. another person i dun really like to see, well, we all sat at the same table. but it's ok, just put on a smile and put on a face.

sunday... hmmm slept until almost 11 then wake up, shiok. well, day passes by normally, sister came to my house to play crazy taxi, then as usual we met up with my mum and had dinner. came home quite early tonite.

TGIF

it's another friday, another week is over. guess this week has been exciting. today is the last day of school for the students, been talking to their parents... well, we say the usual things, same things over and over again.

hubby on the way home from KL... not too excited cos can't go out and party tonite, have to be in school early next morning. sianzzzzzzzzzz

later after seeing the last two parents, am going to driving range to whack some balls. need to exercise.

tmr nite, celebrating grandma's b-day, hope people i dun feel like seeing will not turn up. hope it's a chop chop thing. it's been raining these few days, dunnoe if it'll rains tmr, cos if it rains, then marcus and mabel cannot go swimming, they would sure be very bored. bored to death.

my colleague who is sitting oppposite me is now sleeping and snoring so loudly.

how come i feel so sad that's it's friday? i dun used to feel this way last time, was very happy when it's friday cos can enjoy a nite out with hubby, but today, seems so funny, maybe becos it has been a long day today. used to leave earlier on fridays. sianzzzzzzzzzzz, life is boring, life kills my passion.

work table in a mess

was waiting for the webpage to download, very slow, very slack. anyway, looked around my work table, so messy, need a good packing and re-organising.

these two days, hubby went KL... (ser, mum not suppose to know this, dun tell her) it's me and two children alone at home. well, they won't look for their father, they'll just carry on with their chores of playing and quarelling with each other. Mabel has been irritating her brother lately and the gor gor is getting fed up with her.

left one and a half more years to go before i finish my bond. so long.........

not been exercising lately, dining a lot though with friends and colleagues. die, getting fat, wait nobody want.

no inspiration to blog, nothing exciting lately and too lazy to bring laptop home also.

so shiok

not been blogging for the past few nights. well, spend the last few nights playing crazy taxi with children. it was good to come back home and be able to spend time with M&M, no marking, no preparing of lesson. so shiok!

on saturday nite, also didn't go out, just dun feel like going out to play mahjong that nite, so stayed at home. had a really great time with kids. we all went to sleep at 11 plus and slept all the way to 9 plus the next morning, so shiok. really felt that we needed the sleep.

today also laze around, brought them out for breakfast and dinner, they enjoyed it, well, i enjoyed it too.

heard that marcus and mabel fought on friday and gor gor gave mei mei such a push that she fell down and got one hump on the head. but i think mei mei also notti on her part, always irritating her gor gor and making the gor gor fed up. sigh...

Mabel my daughter

as for Mabel my daughter, she is more of a follower to her gor gor. so when the brother says, 'Mabel, come, play crazy taxi.' she'll start running out from the room. but usually, marcus will get the remote control first.

that nite, heard marcus shouting at mabel twice. shouted at her until she cried, the second time he shouted, i cannot tahan, went into the bedroom and slapped marcus. he never cries, he just rolled his eyes sideway.

mabel is more itchy handed. as i was doing my work with my laptop, she'll touch the documents, play with the paper clips, touch the laptop. well, she's also very busybody. if u need anything, she'll gladly do it for u. She'll help me to bring my hp when it rings, she'll help me put back my rubber band, she'll help my throw away my disposable contact lens. she'll help you put the mouse pad when she sees you setting up the laptop.

both of them, each of their own merits and not so desirable character. parenting is not easy

harassed to play crazy taxi

my son is so cute, i'm still blogging and he keeps repeating 'crazy taxi 3' in my ears. talk about nagging, dunno who is nagging who. have promised him to let me finish my blog first before i play crazy taxi. it's already 10.49pm and lots of things to do. so to my dear sis, how to sleep early?

i still need to read newspaper, play crazy taxi 3 with children, blog and read email, think i'll be sleeping at 12 plus again tonite.

well, to my dear sis again, teachers sux! oops, i think i'm a teacher also hor.... eh.... well, (speechless) anyway, i hope u can cope on thurs with all your last minute stuff by your teachers. and take heart, hardships first, then sweetness will follow soon.

ok, keeping it short, i still need to reply emails. oh no, here marcus comes again, "Mummy, let's play crazy taxi 3, ok? mummy?" how to resist such innocence?

it's only morning n i'm feeling zombie

really zombiefied, nearly typed this out like a letter, opening it with a hi. anyway, didn't have enough sleep, so i guess that's y i'm tired. slept at 12 plus.

it's funny, exams are over yet i'm feeling more tired than ever. guess i'm a worker, can't stop working.

yup, not to worry about the work review later this afternoon. whatever we say, their mind has been made up about us.

think the xbox games are really getting into me. played xbox games from 9 something to 12. of course, my children were playing as well, it's just that they dummy control especially when we play crazy taxi. so funny.

this morning, hubby will be going KL. well, hope everything turns out well and smooth, can come back in one piece. for all who are going on holidays, bon voyage!

still so zombie, coffee not strong enough to lift up those heavy eyelids.

Monday

finally the monday is coming to an end. also can't wait for tues and wed to be over cos these two days are very long days for me. just wish to get over my work review with HOD asap.

a bit worried about the work review too, cos i really dunno what to say to my HOD. what achievements have i done this semester? this semester has pass by so fast, especially the 4th term that i dun have the time to reflect.

guess we all have our worries. students worry if they can be promoted or not, teachers are worrying about deadlines to meet and work review. BGR problems, friendship problems, spouse problems, work problems, family problems. sigh, how come there are so much problems for human beings to handle?

another week is coming

it's a sunday night, the week pass by so quickly especially when u have two days mc.

it's like it's another long week at work again. although exams are over, but there are two more long weeks to go before the holidays. seems like eternity. well, i suppose tmr at school, it's hell broke loose. i can't imagine the headache i'm going to get

nothing much to say, guess the illness has made me more sober, less to reflect. or maybe just to lazy to put my thoughts down in blog.

laughing like a little child

from my sis blog about laughing like a little children and bring out the little child in us.

i do agree that we are sometimes conform by the society to behave and act in a certain way. well, i guess it's up to us to do our little crazy things at times. like taking out our shoes to walk on the grass (tho not advisable, u dunno how many dogs had shitted there!) touch that thing or person. there was once in Singapore and HongKong, on both occasions, i saw cement screed wall and a table top, something which i've always liked at home, especially the cement screed table top, so clean cut, so smooth. i think the people must be crazy, why i was caressing the the wall and table top. well, these are the little things we can do, just do anything we feel like it. no restrictions watsoever.

dun worry, i'll try not to give marcus and mabel plenty of assessment books. that pic is very nice, i'll always remember to let my children smile more. before they go to school and get bog down by homework. i'm also frightened that they will lose the child in them, on one hand i want to encourage them to do their best but on the other hand, i will not push them so hard in their studies, until i sign them up for enrichment and stuff like that. it's quite hard to balance, u noe.

manicure and pedicure

today i went to punggol plaza twice. first, was in the morning, wanted to check out the manicure price, but it was not open. so went home, then later in the afternoon, went back again, this time went in to do a manicure and pedicure. spent about 1 and 1/2 hour there, nice service, with tea to drink. itchy hand and mouth, agreed to a package of 10 manicures $399. well, but at least it's transferable, i can get my sister or my mum or my relatives to go. then got lucky draw. went to the counter to redeem, i got 20 coupons, my god, write until my hand pain.

but after the manicure, i felt quite weak physically. maybe it was suppose to be time for medicine and i haven't taken the medicine, plus the air con blowing, so was feeling very drowsy and weak. came back home, took some medicine, then slept while watching national geographic.

sick

i'm sick today. in fact, i was having a slight cough on monday. but today, i just felt the body very weak and fever developing. went to doc. 37.6 but this doc in punggol only gave me MC for today! that means i have to go back to work tmr! impossible! so at night, went to another doc, this doc, better, gave me two days MC until thurs. power!

nothing much to blog, the medicine is kicking in already, drowsy, better go and rest and sleep well. remembered i wanted to blog something, but it slipped out of my mind, too drowsy to recall. maybe tmr is better.

F***

have the tendancy to type the f word. even blogger took so long.

first to my sis questions on her blog about guys not knowing what gals want. and that worm in the stomach.

it's true that guys and gals want different things in life. gals tend to be more emotional, investing our emotions into little things, that's y they could not understand y we can cry over a drama serial, why we would get angry with little things, why we would get upset with them for not doing certain things.

one thing for sure, our anatomies are different, next, our thinking, our emotions are also different, that makes guys and gals so dun understand each other.
actually have lots of things to say, but i was so angrified, (sis, u noe why right) it's like within one hour, two things can go wrong together. and the day is going to end soon, these things have to come at 9 something at nite to spoil my whole entire day. it's not worth to be kind, not worth to choose to be happy.

i have chosen to be happy, despite a difficult class i have to invigilate today, chosen to be happy even though i'm very tired and wish i could sleep instead of going to the dinner, chosen to be happy despite the appointment i have to go today. (was really tired, i almost fell asleep while driving on the PIE) i dare say i have chosen to be happy, to live my life happily today.

i think my defences were down during the nite, especially after the sumptious dinner, especially thinking that the nite is going to end soon, so it should be alright soon. then the two things must happen, one after anothe, sucks! i really cannot control my emotion anymore, dun want to be happy. what for choose to be happy the whole day, then these things have to come and spoil your day? too tired to fight the negative feelings brewing inside me.

again, at this point, i noe some man must be wondering, what's the whole damn fuss about? just go and sleep, and tmr go and settle the thing, ok already lor, what's the issue?

the issue is, i intend to laze a little tmr morning, dun intend to go to sch tmr, lugged back a laptop and four classes of essays home to mark. now u ask me to go to sch tmr becos it's urgent, u needed the details by tmr morning? i dun think i have a choice to say 'no, u go and find the details yourself, i'm not coming back to sch tmr' there was not a choice here. maybe there is, either u choose to do it happily or choose to do it grumpily. both choices, u still have to do, which is wat i hate most, so i think i've made my choice, i'll do it grumpily cos i really very buay song.

as for the worms in the stomach kind of feeling, it will always be lost. thought i found back the worm in stomach feeling, but after tonite, i find that it was pointless. now that the person has hurt u, it's even more painful cos u have invested so much emotions in it. the hurt is like 20 knives stabbing into your heart like that.

men and women will always be different.

saw a JC fren

where should i start? ok, last nite, went for dinner with hubby and his colleagues becos it was his colleague last day, so in celebration, all decided to have a farewell dinner for her. there were like 14 of us.

at first, it was decided to go marina south for steamboat cum bbq. so only i have the luxury of going back home to bathe before the dinner. hence, since it's marina south, didn't wear too nice, 3/4 pants and a sleeveless collared tee, with slippers, tied up my hair in a ponytail as well. marina south mah, no need so nice.

then guess what, when i go and fetch my hubby, he told me they change to suntec city, the steamboat there. i was like, "why didn't u say so earlier?" it was like this attire is so unglam for the venue.

went anyway, i was already in town already and we were already late, they have started the dinner, so no point going back to change. so after we reached there, we sat down and proceeded with our steamboat buffet.

then the thing happen. i was like eating my food, then this guy from the other table stood up and he had to walk past our table to go and get the food. as he turned around, (so dramatic) i saw him. i was taken aback, becos he definitely looks familiar, he has not changed a single bit at all. i knew it was him, Eric Yeo.

i think he saw me too. he slowed down as he walked past our table. but he continued walking past. i knew we both knew what. then the qn popped into my head, 'should i go and call him?' 'what to say?' to some, recognising an old fren is like a perfectly normal thing, juz go and say hi. but i think my jc frens, especially my good fren, Baohua, will know why it feels awkward to say hi to Eric Yeo. pardon my rudeness in putting his surname, cos there were at least 6 Erics in our JC then, so we need to identify all the Erics by their surname, so it was quite natural to call him this way.

on reflection, i think both of us just lack that little bit of fate. in Chinese, they say 'you yuan wu fen'. ok, anyone can read my blog, can't be too frank. i mean i think there were a few opportunities when we could be together, but somehow, we didn't. we just lack that little fate. chemistry, yah, i could say that we did have some chemistry, in fact, more chemistry than the first bf i chose to be with. i dunno how to express further. you know i actually took 15 mins to write this paragraph. ok, to sum up, put it this way, if i could turn back the clock to JC time, i would have made another choice. did i regret? of course, a little. but then again, if we had been together, then i would not have met my present husband, then i would not have married and have two lovely kids. guess that is life, this is fate. who knows? maybe next life, we may be fated.... if there is next life.

but it really feels funny to see him again. it was like i've been wanting to meet some JC frens, but the more i wanted to meet them, the less chances i have of meeting them. so last nite was totally unexpected. and the thing is i'm so unglam, totally unglam, totally ah soh last nite. shit! so paiseh. he must be thinking, 'oh gosh! how come she become so fat, so ah soh?' haha. still laughing now. nvm, i'll get over it. i guess that's life again.

in the end? well, in the end, we didn't greet each other. in fact, i very much wanted to at least say hi before we all leave the place and get his contact number or at least get his namecard. (my dear husband, if u r reading this blog, dun mind hor. just my honest feelings) but then husband sitting beside me. anyway, we were one of the last two tables to leave. i think from the corner of my eye, he seems like wanting to say hi as he walked past our table, but my head was turned, because i was engaged in a conversation with my friend, so it's very rude to just turn away from my friend and looked at him as he walked past. guess that's another lost opportunity between us. after ten long years, we are still missing out on opportunities.

life is funny. ( and i took 50 mins in all to write this blog, one of the longest writing time)

Sunday nite and monday blues

ok, tmr is monday, time to go to work, feeling the monday blues.

for all those that are reading my blog, feel free to add comments, no worries, we are all open minded, civilised adults and human beings.

tired, going to chalet can be very tiring. well, hope that my sis had a wonderful birthday. she wear until so nice, nobody dare to sabo her. man, she was lucky. but i sincerely hope that she had a wonderful b-day and she took a lot of pictures. well 21st birthday leh. must have memories. i forgot about my 21st birthday already. i only remembered that initially, i wanted to hold it on a private yacht, but it was too expensive, then i forgot how i celebrated. i think in the end it turned out to be a normal dinner celebration.

back to my sis b-day, i think all of us enjoyed, except my mum. and the poor maid got all the scolding from her! haha.

pok, so much for b-day celebration.

think my daughter very cute, just as i'm typing out this blog, she is eating yogurt, but she's slurping the yogurt so loudly, and the yogurt is all around her mouth, and she is smiling at me as i look at her.
on the other hand, my son, not so likeable at times. as i'm typing this blog, he was getting ready to play the xbox game, crazy taxi. but he was like scrapping the disc on the floor. scolded him upside down, then he got angry and he stormed into the room. well, at least he knows how to walk away from anger. now he came out of the room and then hor, like real like that, sitting down with his dad and like going to play like that. children, fun and headache at the same time.

ok, got to go and start marking exam scripts already

catching up

Hey eddie (my papa in council), yes, yes, i eng, so we all should gather and talk! u arrange lah, u got our emails, correct?

then to my dear sis, yah, at first i thought since when we give our daddy my blog address. yah, this is one fren in college which shares the same name as our daddy, so i told him that, and he said then i should have call him papa, so from then on, i always call him papa in college and his gfs would be my mummy.

dating vs married

ok, i admit, i'm extremely tempremental and emotional today. one of those days when i keep thinking and reflectiong about life. this is one of the point in life where i get a little depressed, wondering about life, questioning about life but doing nothing to improve life. i should have taken psychology or philosophy in Uni.

i was thinking,

1) dating. during dating, couples will naturally hold hands, after marriage, they hold their children's hands, they have to make a conscious effort to remember to hold each other's hands.

2) dating, they tried to book into budget hotel to sleep close to one another, or if they do sleepover at each other's house, they dun mind squeezing in a single bed and they can literally sleep on top of each other to save space. marriage, they sleep apart, not facing each other, wanting a private space. they wish they have a bigger bed, so that they have more space to themselves.

3) dating, they kissed naturally, in the lift, on the bus, in public places. marriage, we wondered when is the last time we kissed each other? last week? last month?

this is life, natural process. that's why maybe married couples should take time to remind each other about their love, spending some time together. so guys out there, go and tell your wife that u love her today. she needs it. (even if you don't mean it) haha, irony.

so all the ladies out there, it's not just the guys' job. u too can tell them u love them, and i know we ladies really mean it. but ladies, maintain your health, beauty and body even as we age, cos we want our guys to mean what they say when they say they luv us.

Reality vs Virtual

I could feel that yesterday i had a lot of pent up frustrations in me. i was like ready to burst at anybody who irritates me. but i had to control, i can't just take on anybody.

why was i feeling that way? until now, i still dunno. maybe it's just life, always rushing here and there to do this and that, but what do we achieve ultimately? so that we will not get summon for not buying season parking? so that life is better with more money at hand? so that we will be not be too late to fetch our kids from our in laws? so that our kids will not miss us too much if we are late in fetching them? this is not what i want in life. it's sad, but we have no choice. these are the mandane things we have to do, daily things which will not satisfy our emotions.

i was thinking, i kept saying, "life is worth the living, if we choose to" if we choose to live, choose to be happy, choose to do things that we like/want, choose a carefree life, life is definitely worth the living. maybe i need to be stronger mentally to push out the negative things that makes our lives sux. i dunno. if i can't choose how to live my life, then i really feel that life is not worth the living. that's y creepy thoughts like car crash, dying always come to my mind. but dun worry, i won't kill myself yet. i've my kids and family and ... to push me on.

sad, as i'm typing this, i dunno, i could feel the tears welling up in my eyes.

that's y i retreat to a world of virtual. thanks to the xbox. i like playing 'crazy taxi'. in this game, u get to drive recklessly, crash, and still not die. so i actually enjoying crashing into the oncoming cars. call me crazy, that's what the game is about. in reality, i can't crash into them, even tho i love to, but in virtual i can. and man, i enjoy crashing into vehicles, sending them flying off, then banging them and dragging them, shiok! and crashing into walls, buildings. great enjoyment.

sharks, gtg, c what i mean, i would luv to spend more time on this blog and make it interesting, i felt that i'm only revealing half of my thoughts. but we are always limited by time, the bell is going to ring soon, and i'm limited by this, can't do what i like, see what i mean. how to carry on life?

hate life, hate time